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(At the graveside service for Nathan Davis, Jon's best friend of 21 years)

It was a bittersweet weekend for us.  Jon's best friend of 21 years, Nathan Davis, passed away from a massive heart attack one week ago.  This weekend we drove to Tooele, Utah, to attend his funeral.  It was a difficult time for all of us.  Jon and I both sobbed at the viewing as we said goodbye to our friend.  We sobbed as we embraced his beautiful wife, his wonderful parents, and each other.  Jon was asked to speak at the service.  He spoke of memories that he had with Nathan while they were growing up.  He spoke of Nathan's character.  It was beautiful.  Then he was asked to be one of the pallbearers.  Something that was interesting to me was how different Nathan looked.  He did not look like the Nathan that we knew.  It's amazing how different a person looks when their spirit leaves their body. 

It was very difficult to know that this man, only 32 years old with a wife of only 2 years and 4 children, had been taken from this life so suddenly.  It's a difficult time for me to try and understand why.  He was a good man.  Why would Heavenly Father take him home so early in his life?  I have had a difficult time with this question for a long time, and it really hit me hard this weekend.

Then we had brunch with another friend yesterday before we left Utah.  We met his girlfriend, who found out a few weeks ago that she has breast cancer.  She's 30!  How is all of this happening to people our age?  They have a brand new baby!  I know that she will survive the cancer and have a full recovery, but still, it is so hard to understand why.

Still, it makes me appreciate my family so much.  I just wanted to hold, hug, or even just touch Jon's hand all weekend long.  It's hard for me today to have him back at work.  I just want to cuddle my sweet girls all day long.  I wanted to crawl into bed with Jocey last night and hold her.  Life is fragile.  More so than we think.  We cannot live each day as if it were our last, but it may be, and we need to make the most of it.  AND, we need to take care of ourselves.  More than ever, I want to take care of my body - eat healthy, exercise, get my regular check ups.  And it makes me want to spend every moment I can with my family. 

We spent the remainder of our weekend with Jon's family.  His mom, sister, and nephew drove up with us.  His dad, brothers and other sister were there to mourn with us, celebrate life with us, and have many laughs.  We bowled.  We ate food we shouldn't have.  :)  We shared memories.  And oh my goodness did we ever laugh.  It was wonderful.  And it was beautiful.  The weather was foggy, but it created an ethereal scene with frost on the trees.  I am learning to appreciate small things now. 



And we were never so grateful to be home, in Las Vegas.  It was cloudy, snowy, and rainy the whole way home, until we were coming over the hill into Clark County and the clouds broke.  It's good to be home.